As August got underway, I decided to use the month as a kind of retreat.

I didn’t have a clear vision of what this would be when I made the decision, and I still don’t. The past two weeks have had a staycation energy, though I’ve been working as usual.

When I’m not working, I’m taking neighborhood walks, discovering local sights and sounds that I don’t usually notice. Taking advantage of my roof. Enjoying the less-boisterous quality of NYC in August.

This has also been a necessary time of social retreat.

At first this was just a matter of practicality; I took a vacation in June, which was wonderful. But travel comes at a price, and when you work for yourself, time off has a price tag, too. I knew when I got home that I’d be focused on staying in and mindful spending for the rest of the summer.

As I did this, I realized how badly I needed alone time.

The word “retreat,” for me, suggests a going inward, a withdrawing from the outside world.

This isn’t really my style anymore. After being relatively isolated prior to, then during, Covid, I’ve experienced a lot of happiness in embracing my more outgoing side once again.

To be honest, though, I’ve felt myself moving close to the periphery of depression for the last few weeks. I have enough experience now to know how to recognize the signs and take care of myself in a way that’s often successfully preventive.

Overwhelm and fatigue make things worse, whereas rest and mental space are helpful. Each of them gives me the capacity to see more clearly.

So while I’ve kept a bunch of my plans intact, I’ve said no to some things that would probably have been fun, if the timing were right. I’ve kept my schedule clear.

The funny thing about being home more than usual is that my physical space has seemed, as if by magic, to become more abundant.

In trying to “cook the pantry” and clear out my freezer, I’ve found so many bits and bobs from meal prep that I’d forgotten about. I’ve uncovered cans and jars and boxes of pasta that I didn’t realize I had—all still perfectly good to eat.

I’ve been attempting to clear and organize my closet space. I haven’t really succeeded at this, but even a little bit of poking around has helped me to find a cardigan that had slid off its hanger, which I thought I’d left someplace. Likewise for an umbrella and a pair of sandals that had gone missing.

The other morning, I was worried because I thought I’d lost one pair of a pair of earrings that belonged to my late godmother. I took a deep breath, told myself that it couldn’t have possibly gone very far, and resolved to look again in a few hours.

On the following day, when I searched my bedside table drawer again, I not only found the missing earring—in a place where I swear I’d already looked—but also a ring that I haven’t been able to find for over a year.

And in this time of simplicity and solitude, I’ve actually gotten more than the usual amount of loving wishes and sweet texts from friends. Not in an impinging way, and not because I’ve been vocal about how I’m feeling. Just because love and care find a way.

Retreat, noun:

Any one of these definitions could fit.

But in this time of withdrawal, of narrowing my environment and orbit, my immediate surroundings have somehow become more bountiful. I’ve found things I wasn’t looking for.

When we accept and settle into things just as they are, they often meet us with surprises. To realize this is the best gift that I could have taken away from my weeks of refuge.

I hope you give yourself some sort of permission to choose simplicity, privacy, or peace—whatever “retreat” means to you, really—in the coming week. Happy Sunday, friends. Here are some recipes and reads.

Recipes

1. For some reason, I associate muesli with the fall—a back-to-school thing, maybe?—and I’m loving this easy recipe.

2. Tomato fritters are such a great idea.

3. Sheet pan tofu burritos look like a great make-ahead meal.

4. Love the crispy exterior on these rice paper dumplings.

5. I really want to try assassin’s pasta! With vegan parm in place of pecorino.

Reads

1. I’m so very far from perfect when it comes to single use plastic consumption. But I’m always trying to do better, and I thought it was cool to read about some of the emerging solutions—all of which will require people like me to be more conscious.

2. Along similar lines, an examination of how much individual dietary changes could really help to mitigate climate change.

3. An important reminder that eating disorders can affect anyone. They touch so many lives, and those lives look incredibly different from one another.

4. An interesting look at the work of veterinarians who are interested in helping to prevent the next pandemic.

5. Heman Bekele is helping to pioneer a soap that could prevent skin cancer (!), and he’s Time Magazine‘s 2024 kid of the year.

It’s time to continue poking around my quite overstuffed pantry and decide what’s on the agenda for this week’s meal prep. I’m wishing you a very lovely Sunday afternoon.

xo