Weekend Reading
February 6, 2022

Weekend Reading | The Full Helping

As you probably noticed, it’s been a little while.

There’s no big or dramatic reason for this. My capacities are just really limited right now.

For the last six weeks or so—really, since the start of the new year—I’ve found myself saying “I can’t” a lot. It’s not even a choice, the “learning how to say no” stuff that so many of us are working on. It’s a limitation I can’t control, a scarcity of ability and energy that’s out of my hands.

This is interesting in the sense that it has forced me to narrow down dramatically what does and doesn’t get my attention. My yoga practice is flourishing in spite of how limited I feel in other ways. On the work front, I’m focused on my nutrition private practice and the editing process for my next cookbook.

In every other way, I feel incapable. All but the most important work matters are on hold for right now. I don’t have a lot of energy to talk or socialize—which is weird, because I entered 2022 excited to end my quarantine and see friends again. I definitely can’t answer the dreaded “how are you?” question over text or email.

My best friend has asked me about a short trip at the end of this month, and I keep stalling on buying a plane ticket because I have no clue how I’ll feel by then. I’m not even watching much TV. In the evening I work on my book manuscript, I message a little with a few friends, I do a short meditation, and I sleep.

For what it’s worth, it doesn’t feel like a depressive spell. It might be overwhelm or burnout—I’m not sure. Maybe it’s wintering. Maybe I’m processing personal matters more privately than I have in the past.

Whatever the case, it’s strange.

One thing I wanted to mention today—a reminder I always need, and maybe you need it, too—is that nothing terrible has happened while I’ve been in low power mode. There are no work catastrophes. My friends don’t seem to hate or resent me for needing some time to myself. Life is waiting for me on the other side of stillness.

If you happen to experience a similar phase anytime soon, life will wait for you, too.

I’m not reading much of anything, digital or print, so it’s not easy to collect links for these posts. But I do miss the connection of writing and being here with this community.

Thanks for presence, even when I’m not very present myself. And happy Sunday, friends. Here are some recipes and reads.

Recipes

I’ve never had much luck with vegan crepes. I think Alissa is about to help me with that.

Nothing like a big bowl of spaghetti and greens for supper.

I’ve never tried braising daikon before, but I really like the idea of serving it this way.

Speaking of capacity, homemade pasta isn’t even under consideration right now. But these butternut squash ravioli are made with wonton wrappers, and they do look really easy.

Red wine in chocolate cake is such an intriguing baking idea—and it’s perfect for Valentine’s Day, too.

Reads

1. Abdul Alim, who was one of Pakistan’s oldest survivors of Covid-19, has died of natural causes at age 104. I was so moved reading about his efforts to keep others safe and well.

2. It’s distressing to hear about sea turtle stranding and the vulnerability that sea turtles face in these times. But it is very heartening and affirming to read about the efforts that human beings are taking to protect them.

3. A physician’s sobering reflections on having to deny a patient an extra blanket for her bed, and how that experience captures healthcare providers’ moral distress during the pandemic.

4. Loved this argument for steaming cabbage. I’m a big defender of steaming as a preparation method for vegetables generally, and cabbage is one vegetable that I think becomes especially sweet and lovely when it’s steamed.

5. Finally, I loved reading about Margaret Wise Brown, the woman behind Goodnight Moon.

OK everyone. Thank you for listening and accepting me as I navigate this season. I appreciate you.

xo

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    4 Comments
  1. Hi Genia. I’ve been going through a similar season in my life and it’s nice to read your experiences and thoughts around it. I’m low energy and yet my mind is brimming with ideas…until the next day when all I want to do is, well, nothing. I don’t know if it’s menopause or winter or going into the third year of a pandemic. I’ve followed up with my doctors and with medical tests, so things are fine on that front. So there’s nothing to do but just going with it for now: accepting my limitations, and taking care of my nutrition and sleep requirements while also keeping a space for hope for the future. I wish you wellness on your journey. FWIW I just discovered you because I was looking for a vegan bundt cake recipe. I’ll be making it this weekend! Chocolate definitely helps times like this. 🙂

  2. Every one of your weekend reading posts resonates with me, Gena. You’re not alone in these ebbs and flows of energy/presence. Always here to read, when you get to posting or not – I will always appreciate whatever you share on here when you’re able to. I hope you know your words reach people in a way that helps us feel a little less alone (at least speaking for myself!). xoxo, Hannah (longtime reader, from provincetown…now in CA)

  3. “Wintering” is one of my favorite modes of being, Dear Gena. And yes, it will all be there when you are ready to meet it again. Being quiet is so essential. I bow to you as you follow your instinct and care for yourself this way. Much love–and I look forward to reading about Margaret Wise Brown. Thank you xoxo

  4. Thanks for sharing, Gena. As a long-time reader but first-time commenter, I just wanted to voice my appreciation for you. Thanks for always being so candid about your experience and for being vulnerable. As I read your posts, I often find that your emotions resonate with my own, which in turn heightens my own self-awareness (occasionally, these will be emotions that I was not even entirely aware of before reading). So, thanks for articulating what I often cannot name myself.
    I really hope things get easier for you soon. Wishing you all the best.

You might also like

As I mentioned last Sunday, I’ve had some thought-provoking, deep exchanges with new acquaintances lately. One of these was a few weeks ago. I got on the topic of age with a woman whom I’d recently met. According to her, we each live many lives. She told me that she’s living one of her early lives. Her eighteen-year-old daughter, on the other hand, has lived a great many lives before this one. It was a very novel outlook for me. Yet the woman…

I still remember my first semester of Orgo as a post-bacc student, when my friend Erin sat with me in the library and did her best to explain the concept of chirality. She stretched her palms in front of me and asked me to imagine a mirror plane between them: right and left were mirror images of each other. She folded her palms together to bring the point home. “But no matter what,” she said, “I can’t stack my right palm on top…

Like most people, I complain about winter. I bemoan the cold. I talk about how annoying it is to pile on and peel off layers of clothing. I say that I’m unmotivated to go outside. This winter, however, I’ve had to ask myself whether all of this, or any of it, is true. If I’m being honest, January has been sort of lovely in its deep wintriness. On the most wet or cold nights, I’ve curled up at home, catching up on TV…

This fall is all about fresh starts for me. In the past week, I’ve been feeling the excitement that comes with that more than ever. I’m so glad to be relaunching my nutrition counseling practice and enjoying the work as it comes in. I’m still in disbelief when I wake up each morning and realize that there isn’t any schoolwork to do; instead of laboring over assignments, I can sit down at my desk each day and map out professional goals, think about…